“when you act boldly for good, no matter how small, you free us to do the same.” Rachel Rose Reid’s drosh on Jonah.

5 01 2010

Jonah Drosh

[this is the version RRR delivered more or less verbatim on the afternoon of Yom Kippur. She wrote it for the day, but her message is timeless.

When reading this it may help you to remember her standing on a chair at the front of Craxton just before The Gates began to close].

This is an opinion and a personal exploration and interpretation of an aspect of Yonah, not a rabbinically shored-up one.

1) I’m too young to die!

I was on an airplane this week and the same thing happened to me that always happens.. maybe it’s happened to you.  Remember (or imagine this) bumps…beeps…weird engine noises…seatbelt lights…announcement…remember I am 40,000feet in the air…mind starts racing…If you were ever in that situation, or something similar, I want you to bring that awareness alive.

That feeling on a turbulent airplane, the moment of a diagnosis, that surge of panic, that twinge of true life melodrama.  It shouts

Not me! Not yet! I have something to live for!  There’s so much good I have yet to do in the world!”.

What? What do you have to live for?

What is the good in the world you have yet to do? Is there good work for you still to do?

This is the state of mind we are meant to be in today. But the mind doesn’t race as fast as it does in a storm over the Atlantic. Small or large.  Campaigning for peace? Returning the stapler to the guy in the next cubicle? A call to your grandma?  Volunteering to do what you promised to? Making something more beautiful?

2) Detachment, Deferring and Procrastination

Then the Lord sent a great wind on the sea, and such a violent storm arose that the ship threatened to break up….All the sailors were afraid and each cried out to his own god. And they threw the cargo into the sea to lighten the ship. But Jonah had gone below deck, where he lay down and fell into a deep sleep. The captain went to him and said, “How can you sleep?”

Ask yourself: When I have been inspired to do something good, big or small, why would I instead choose to go into the belly of the ship and how is it that I could sleep?

When you have been inspired to do something good, why would you stick to your usual pattern of behaviour, and perhaps go back to checking your emails instead of acting on the thought?

They draw lots, they point to Jonah.  Jonah admits guilt. They ask his advice.  He says ‘throw me in the sea’. Despite this, they act on their instincts for good. They try to row to shore. They pray for forgiveness.

Why would God not just calm the seas at this point?  In this case, God will not calm the seas for them and their prayers, because this is Jonah’s battle.

Jonah’s doing.

Only Jonah can get himself out.

But even as he begins to repent, Jonah abdicates responsibility  “You hurled me into the deep, into the very heart of the seas, and the currents swirled about me;all your waves and breakers swept over me [hang on, says God, I think you did that bit].”

Your thoughts, the little things, the big things that could be done that would improve the world even one iota, are your thoughts. If you avoid doing them, If you try and multi-task or drive yourself mad with self-doubt or distractions  you will drown. Yes, you know this.

So please contemplate:

Ask yourself -  when have you had the instinct or inspiration to do good?

What, if anything,  has stopped you from acting on it?

You may wish to discuss your responses with friends or family.

3) What will people say..?

When God forgives the people of Nineveh, following their repentance, Jonah’s response is famously petulant:  Jonah was greatly displeased and became angry.  “O Lord, is this not what I said when I was still at home? That is why I was so quick to flee to Tarshish. I knew that you are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abounding in love, a God who relents from sending calamity. Now, O Lord, take away my life, for it is better for me to die than to live.”

There are different reasons given for why Jonah responds this way.

Some say it is because that as a representative of the characteristic of ‘Din’ – judgement – he cannot believe that God is able to allow people to live who have lived so sinfully until now.

Some say it is more about Jonah’s disappointment and anxiety around how other people will perceive him, i.e. ‘People will think I am a rubbish prophet if I keep making prophecies and then they don’t happen, so I’d rather die’.

Being a great prophet, or the idea of being one did not help Jonah to effect change.  If anything it’s magnitude made him run in the opposite direction for fear it would not work out as he wished.

In a society designed a particular way, we are encouraged from our first visit to the school careers officer  to think ‘what should I be?’ ‘what shall I be, so that people acknowledge me’.  It is not about what you are.  It is about what you do.

I am interested in this ‘what would people think of me’ angle, because I feel it is the lock in each of us here today, which when opened will set a world of possibilities turning, especially when it comes to this chevra, this joining of Wandering Jews, Carlebach Minyan, Moishe House, our families and new friends.  Having run Moishe House with my co-residents for two years, I am aware that there is a very common obstacle in our paths, and it needs to be changed:  If you act for good, noone will think you are showing off.  Maybe some people will think you are weird. But if you do it, you make it okay for all those other people to do it and maybe they will join you.

Your actions may not save a city of one hundred and twenty thousand people. Perhaps your idea was just to speak to the lonely looking person at the next Carlebach Minyan, to open your home for a Wandering Jews, or to teach your  unicycle-simulator-software-making class at Moishe House?  Why did you not do it yet?  And what are you waiting for?

To stick up the ‘I’m Hungry Let’s go eat’ orange stick today in the service (speaking of which, how many of you have wanted to stick those sticks up at some point but haven’t because you thought you’d look silly?)  or sing ‘la la la’ really loudly to the prayers because you feel the music but don’t know the words.

Why did you not do it yet?  And what are you waiting for?

The things you think of at a moment of emergency.

Why did you not do it yet? And what are you waiting for?

Is it because of ‘us’/'them’? And what we or they will think of you?

Do you think we’ll think you are showing off? Do you think we’ll think you’re silly?  Do you think we’ll think you’re nuts? Do you think we’ll judge you negatively?

Each of these actions if boldly done forms the shape of our community.

Each of these actions if never taken leaves us drifting passively as Jonah mostly does throughout his tale.

When you act boldly for good, no matter how small, you free us to do the same.

This is how this whole service came to be.

Look at the people around you for a second. Regardless of background, affiliation, life  experience, please realise that they came here to share and create this experience with you. (something you can never be quite as sure of at any other shul in the surrounding area).

4) The Withering Vine

At the end of the book, Jonah is yet to learn the value of his act, even as he stares out at a whole city saved by his own work.  God makes a vine for him and then makes a worm that causes it to wither, leaving Jonah hot and without safe shelter. Not for the first time, Jonah says he’s ready to die.

When we feel no connection, no empathy for the city of strangers, our world shrinks to a tiny shell around us. Our partner. Our house. Our room. Our computer. Our vine. Our whale. Our navel.

And of course then, if the vine is damaged, our world falls apart. Ofcourse Jonah is ‘angry enough to die

For the community is out there, where the other people are.

Speaking with Debbie yesterday, she told me about a friend who has a vision of God she reminds herself of.  In her friend’s vision, she imagines running towards God, arms outstretched.  God picks her up by the shoulders, turns her round 180 degrees and pushes her back into the world.

To go back a little, in the belly of the big fish, Jonah sings to the Source:

“.. with a song of thanksgiving, I will sacrifice to you. What I have vowed I will make good. Salvation comes from the Lord”

To which God says,

“great. Nice poem. Go and do what I told you before”

Enough running away.

Enough hiding in the bows of ships

Enough sleeping through the storm

Enough ignoring the offers of help from passing sailors

Enough wishing to die in the black abyss of the sea

Enough expounding poetry from a stagnant whale belly that costs several hundred pounds a week to rent.

Enough wishing to be seen as the great ‘thing’ you think you are meant to be seen as

Enough weeping about your own vine whilst ignoring the change in the people you just walked away from.

Be brave.

Own your space.

Take responsibility for what these people you just looked at and your community, whoever they are, will become through your actions.

To paraphrase Nelson Mandela. Because I can.

You are a small conscious part of a far greater Consciousness

Your playing small does not serve the you, us or the world.

There is nothing enlightened about shrinking for fear of other people feeling insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make the most of what we have within us.

It’s not just in some of us; it is in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.





***Feedback Form now online!***

15 10 2009

Please, please let us know your thoughts. We would love to know what you thought about the Grassroots project and the services you came to: all feedback is extremely welcome as we work out where to go from here…
 
Please click on the link and answer the questions: it should only take a few minutes.

Click Here to take survey

With love,

The Grassroots Jews Team





“individuals and their right to love must be at the core of any sexual ethic.” Daniel Lichman’s D’var Torah on Leviticus 18

1 10 2009

The Jewish thinker and mystic Jay Michaelson has recently written a fantasy short story about what would happen if Leviticus 18:22 – the infamous psuk that we are about to hear in the leyning, referred to by the gay Jewish community as the “psuk that must not be named” were to miraculously disappear from every Torah in the world. In the story he takes us through lots of different conversations between Jewish communities who had related to it in in different ways. The conversations between gay Jews ourselves/themselves, can be broadly defined as two approaches to this text. For me at this moment these two approaches are very much in tension. It is this tension and a possible way of reading the passage today that I am going to talk about now.The first approach is to read it and struggle with it because it matters. For some it may be halachically binding and so inescapable, for others it needs to be owned as part of our tradition that needs to be addressed. For some living in this approach it is difficult, guilt ridden and depressing, for others it is an opportunity for creative halachic discussion and interpretive power. Sometimes both the difficult emotion and creative approaches can coexist.

The second approach would be to dismiss it as the product of a particular time and place; something in the Torah for us to define our modern ethics against, rather than alongside. Within this approach there is also an opportunity for creative reading, interpretation and modern midrash, something that Rabbi Elizabeth Tikvah Sarah, one of the first Lesbian rabbis in this country, has done so well.

I grew up in a religious tradition that fitted firmly within the second approach.

When I initially thought about what I was going to be talking about, I thought I was going to stand here and say how important it is to confront tradition, to grapple with text and struggle with how to incorporate it into one’s life. As the first time in synagogue when it has been read on Yom Kippur afternoon (my home shul replaces it with a passage from Deuteronomy) I was going to welcome the opportunity to think in the first approach and all its complexity.

The more I played with that idea in my mind and particularly as I reflected on the experience of my friends who have grown up in an orthodox environment and struggled with this passage in a way that I have never had to, a way that so often caused themselves much anguish, harm and pain in the process, I realised I wasn’t sure if I wanted to offer that approach, one that would collude with the rabbinic reading of the text on as important a day.So instead of these approaches to specific verse, let us take a step back to look at why the whole section is read on Yom Kippur afternoon at all. According Mishna Taanit, Yom Kippur and Tu b’Av were the happiest days of the year when young men and women would go out into the vineyards and choose their partners. With this going on it seems that the reading of Leviticus 18 was instituted to remind people how they should behave when meeting prospective sexual partners.

For us, engaged in the process of Teshuva, a reminder to us to consider our own sexual morality at this time and particularly the chapter’s theme of how sexuality relates to power, is an important part of the evaluation of our life, and perhaps something that can only best be confronted when we have broken ourselves in to YK and have reached this later stage in the day. Whether our sexual ethic is halachic, personally formed over time or read in a self-help book, we are reminded of the importance of having one.

I hope this approach can be useful for many of you when this passage is read, but for me, it isn’t going to work. Whatever I say there is no way I can get away from the pain that this passage has caused so many gay people, leading to so much internal strife and suffering. So for me the tension between the two approaches I started with certainly remains and I will not be able to sit easy as it is read.

Jay Michaelson finishes his short story with an important reminder to us. He leaves behind all of the angry discussions, halachic complications and philosophising; the reader is left in the presence of a Gary and Jonah, a gay couple in love. For all our halachic argumentations, loop holes, creative interpretations, individuals and their right to love must be at the core of any sexual ethic.





“this is the first time I’ve been in a shul on Rosh Hashanah for eight years” Naomi Alderman’s Sermon.

1 10 2009

Oof. This part of the year is *full* of Jewish festivals. As full, to steal a Douglas Adams metaphor as a pomegranate is of pips, which is an apposite image because pomegranates are one of the symbols of the season (I think it has to do with fertility). So I am quite busy but in a good way – socializing, a bit of praying/meditating/thinking-about-stuff, making foods… Making the most of the season before winter comes to get us.

For Rosh Hashanah, Jewish New Year which was 19th and 20th September, I attended the Grassroots Jews services. This is a wonderful new venture – services focused on spirituality and community rather than the strict letter of anything. It neatly avoids the whole problem I talked about when I went to the Liberal Synagogue – that liberals can be quite as dogmatic in their beliefs as the Orthodox. My best example of this: in the email that went around giving details of the arrangements for the services, they had *both* of the following:
a) details for people who wanted to bring prayerbooks and food to the venue before the Sabbath started (because Orthdox people don’t carry on the Sabbath)
*and*
b) details about parking on the day (Orthodox people don’t drive on Sabbath, but non-Orthodox do).
Neither set of arrangements was presented with a slight snigger (how silly these people are) or a note of disapproval (of course the *best* people won’t do this…) as it might have been elsewhere. I was very impressed.

Anyway, I delivered a sermon of sorts on the second day of Rosh Hashanah. I began by announcing that it would be an atheist sermon. Or an agnostic one. Perhaps. Maybe. I’m not sure whether it’s agnostic or not.

I’ve written it up into some notes, so you can get the gist – it’s hard to write down talks though, they inevitably lose something in the translation. But here’s broadly what I said:

1. When I was a child, my parents took me to this ’spiritual’ synagogue in London (Yakar), where people seemed more concerned about talking about their relationship to Judaism than about arranging a ladies’ guild. And therefore when I was a teenager I thought my parents were crackers and in my early 20s joined a shul with a ladies’ gallery and a kiddush rota etc etc. And of course now here I am back in a place much like where I started – a service committed to egalitarianism, to tolerance and to, yes, spirituality.

2. This is a natural development of our relationship with our parents. We start off thinking everything they say is right. And then we go through a stage of thinking everything they say is wrong. And then we reach a place of forgiveness, where we can say “this was right, but this was bullshit”. We’re grateful for the things they got right, and at first we’re angry for the things they got wrong but later we can forgive them.

3. This is the first time I’ve been in a shul on Rosh Hashanah for eight years.

4. Why? Because eight years ago, I was living in Manhattan. Rosh Hashanah was two days after 9/11. 9/11 was the Tuesday and Rosh Hashanah was the Thursday night. And I stood in that shul, with the stench of death and destruction in my nostrils, and read the prayers about how God is a just God and a righteous God and I thought: fuck this.

5. At that shul my parents used to take me to, the Rabbi Mickey Rosen, of blessed memory used to talk a lot about his spiritual problems. And at the time, as a child, I thought “my god this is boring”. Children don’t really have spiritual problems. (This got a good laugh, although I’m not sure why…) But with the understanding that some of you might be bored by this, I’m about to talk about my own spiritual problems.

6. There is evil in the world and it is a problem. It is, in fact, the problem of evil. Why would a good, loving, all-seeing, all-knowing, all-powerful God allow it? If God were truly good and just and merciful surely he would prevent terrible evils like 9/11 and the many daily tragedies that surround us. Some people are satisfied with the answer to the problem of evil that goes “ah well, we can’t see the whole picture. God causes plagues and floods but there’s a giant tapestry and we only see a small bit of it.” I’m not satisfied with this at all. I don’t accept that there can ever be a justification for the evil things that happen in the world.

7. So, here’s a thought that I’ve had. Not a solution. A thought. It’s based on the therapeutic insight that often we end up giving other people what we need ourselves. Maybe we want to be nurtured, so we end up nurturing others. Maybe we want to be listened to, so we spend a lot of time listening to other people. I was thinking about this as I was contemplating the Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur service, with all of its emphasis on forgiveness. “Forgive us!” we cry to God, and God says “I forgive you, I forgive you, I forgive you.” And it made me think…

8. Perhaps, if you have a spiritual problem like mine, you could try what I’m trying. Perhaps we can try to forgive God.

9. Maybe this is a mature relationship, a two-way relationship. We talk about God as a parent, a father. Maybe like a parent, we can be grateful for some things we’ve been given but for others… all we can do is try to forgive.

10. Thank you, and Shana Tova

Naomi Alderman is an author, living and writing in Hendon. To lean more about Naomi visit her blog at http://naomialderman.typepad.com/





GRJ is SOLD OUT!

16 09 2009

Yes indeed, we are now completely sold out. 
We’d like to express our huge appreciation to everyone who helped us achieve this – and to all of you who have supported us in some way over the past few months. 

If you haven’t sorted out a place to pray yet – we advice you do so soon. Most Synagogues do charge and all of them have, by necessity, heightened security over the High Holy Days. So take time tomorrow to give them a call if you want to join them.

There are two excellent websites providing info on how and where to find Synagogues of all denominations:
www.jeneration.org
and 
www.jewpro.co.uk

Please note – we will have no space for people wanting to just “pop by”. And we appreciate you not putting our dedicated security volunteers under any added pressure by trying to do so. Thank you in advance for your understanding.

Wishing you all a sweet new year and well over the fast,

The GRJ Team





shOfar so GooD (g-D)

15 09 2009




All your informational needs…

12 09 2009

Dear all,

We are delighted that you are joining us for Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur. We look forward to spending really fun, interesting, relaxed and meaningful High Holyday services with you.

This post should contain all the info you need.

TICKETS

Names of people who have booked places will be on a guest list on the door. There will be no paper tickets. Due to the large amount of interest YOU WILL NEED A TICKET, DEAR FRIENDS.

ADDRESS

Rosh Hashana will take place in a marquee in a garden in Hampstead and Yom Kippur in a classical concert venue – you will get the address in an email once you have paid for your ticket but if you have lost it then please email grassrootsjews@gmail.com

 

LAST MINUTE SHOW UPS?

We will be completely full up, and we will sadly be unable to fit into the space any friends who show up having not booked. (If people come who haven’t booked, there won’t be chairs for the people who have – we do hope you understand!).

WHICH SERVICES WE ARE DOING:

Friday night 18th September

Sat morning RH Day One 19th Seotember

Sunday morning RH Day Two 20th September

Sunday evening Kol Nidre 27th September

Monday day Yom Kippur 28th September

We will NOT be doing mincha and maariv on Saturday, or mincha and maariv on Sunday. (But contact us if you would like to know about a small m and m taking place elsewhere on Sat night).

TIMES

Rosh Hashana – Erev – Mincha at 19:00

Rosh Hashana – Morning

08:00 Pesukei de-zimra/yoga

09:00 Shacharit

10:30 Torah Service

11:20 Kiddush

11:45 Shofar (2nd day only)/Mussaf

13:30 End of Service

YOM KIPPUR

Kol Nidre – 18:30

Yom Kippur – Day

07:30 Pesukei de-zimra/yoga

09:00 Shacharit

10:30 Torah Service

12:00 Mussaf

14:00-17:00 BREAK

17:00 Mincha

18:00 Neila

19:30 Shofar – Break-fast

Post Services: Kiddush Levana w/Yossi

COMMUNAL MEALS

We will have communal pot luck meals, where everyone brings a veggie dish, on Friday night and Sunday lunch in the marquee which all are welcome to come to join. We also have some people in our community who have offered to host people for Saturday lunch at their home. Jemma Lerner, Anna Hyman and Ethan Greenwood are co-ordinating these. Contact Jemma Lerner on jemma_lerner@hotmail.com if you would like to come to any of these and to help coordinate dishes.

MACHZORIM

Please bring your own machzor. You are welcome to drop it round before shabbat at the Pomeroy’s. We will be following the Artscroll Machzor as this is used by most people. But we will ensure people with other machzorim can follow too.

WE WOULD LOVE YOUR PARTICIPATION

Let us know if you’d like to get involved. If you’d like to try something you’ve not done before like receive an aliyah, do hagbahah or gelilah (lifting or dressing the Torah), or, if you’re a cohen, duchaning (reciting the priestly blessing), please contact Michael Grant at grassroots.jews@michael-grant.me.uk in plenty of time, and he’ll be happy to teach you.

THE SERVICE will be traditional, well, mostly traditional (yoga psukei dzimrah aside). There will be a graffiti mechitza (artfully designed by Elliott Tucker) for people who want to sit separately and there will also be an area for mixed seating. Women and men will be called up to the Torah in accordance with halacha. Women will be reading the haftarah on both days.

CONTACT US

Email: grassrootsjews@gmail.com

Phone: 07949491271

Website: http://grassrootsjewishnewyearproject.wordpress.com

This is an experiment. We are just a group of friends who just got together and decided to do this, and it’s actually happening. It will be wonderful we are sure. We have asked people to contribute £45 because we need to cover the cost of our guest cantor travel and fees, plus the considerable cost of hiring a marquee and Craxton studio hire. However, we would encourage people to see this as a community project in which everyone is a participant as opposed to a consumer / attendee (hence our call to you to get involved in all sorts of ways). We hope we can all enjoy it together in the spirit of community, exploration, participation and togetherness. We do look forward to seeing you then,

Best wishes,

Anna G, Anna H, Daniella, Elie, Elliott, Ethan, Flora, Gabriela, Jemma, Jeremy, Lenny, Michael, Naomi, Natasha, Rachel I, Rachel M, Tammy, Yossi, Zoe





We’d like to think of everyone as living breathing participants – not just spectators /attendees – a message from the grassroots gabbai

9 09 2009

 

Hi, my name is Michael, and together with Flora Hoori  I’ll be your co-gabbai at Grassroots Jews. I’m a regular—and frequently gabbai—at Assif, the tuneful and participatory Masorti minyan in Finchley, but this will be my first time gabbai-ing on the High Holydays.

 

If you’d like to try something you’ve not done before—receiving an aliyah, doing hagbahah or gelilah (lifting or dressing the Torah), or, if you’re a cohen, duchaning (reciting the priestly blessing)—please approach me (a reasonable time) beforehand, or contact me via grassroots.jews@ *cough* michael-grant.me.uk (minus the spam trap between the asterisks), and I’d be happy to teach you. Read the rest of this entry »





You’re all welcome to join us for some lovely yom tov meals – details here from Jemma Lerner

8 09 2009

I’ve personally been considering how much happiness food can bring over the past few days, from brie to homemade chocolate brownies, to the guilty pleasures of pizza and ice-cream. For me, tucking into meals together is nurturing in a differently important way to prayer and friendship, and shared meals will be a big part of the Grassroots experience. 

Read the rest of this entry »





Zoe Jankel on why I’m involved with Grassroots Rosh and Yom

7 09 2009

Being barely religious and rarely interested in matters of the spirit, I’m not an obvious contender for involvement in something such as Grassroots Jews. Some of my non-Jewish friends identify me as a cultural Jew and it is true that I mainly avoid synagogue and on the rare occasion I am obliged to go, I will sit, hiding my paperback inside a Siddur, studiously ignoring the prayers around me…

Read the rest of this entry »